Taking back some of the control.

Today I finally found a phone number which I think may lead me to Derek; ‘uncle’, the sexual abuser of a child. The one who took away my innocence and any real chance of forming a decent relationship. So I dialled the number 4 times but it was just ringing out. I will try another couple of days over the week and if there remains no answer I will be driving to that house to see if it’s that filthy animal.

I have been spending time thinking about what sort of a future I will have now that I can no longer remain in the RAF. I accept that and somehow I have to move on if I want any semblance of my new ‘norm’. Any job which brings any form of pressure or stress may set me back whilst messing my employer about. There are days when I will hardly be able to function in a pressured environment so I have come to the conclusion I need something I can control myself. A job where I can decide when to work and what hours to work. A couple of my friends have complimented my decorating and DIY skills and stated I should take it up as a job. I shrugged the comments off previously but I really do enjoy it and it is something I can manage myself. There is no stress and noone to get stressed over. I have decided to start up ‘Shell Belle’s Handyworker’. I’m taking some control back and please god let this work. Wish me luck guys xx

image

About mitsanuk

I left the RAF in 2015 following 20 years as a frontline paramedic. It has been an amazing career but then found myself suffering because of this. My blog exists as an outlet for me as well as a place for others to read and try to understand the mind of someone with PTSD. Please feel free to make comment on any post and lets raise some discussions on how we can help to end the stigma which surrounds mental illness. Thank you for taking the time to read this. Please follow and share in the hope my experience will help others.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Taking back some of the control.

  1. You will do great sis luv you xxx

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s